Who was I to think that after college, dating and relationship life would get easier. Some days I think it could be karma and some days I think it’s just the way it’s suppose to be for me. This piece derives from a few different areas; one a recent a conversation with a friend, recent articles/documentaries I’ve seen, and past experiences since having graduated college.
Reversing the order, the article and documentary focused on frustrated men moving to Brazil for love and a different type of romantic woman. The conversation I had with my friend was about our mutual struggle of dating and relationships post college, from her female perspective. We laughed a bit, but the sentiments were true, its been a struggle. And finally, I’ve documented my struggle over the last two years in two other pieces, My Aint Shit Women and My Aint Shit Women Pt. 2, titled respectively.
While this particular piece isn’t another one of those, that going to catalog the women and what happened between us. It’s categorically different from those, so who was I to think that dating and relationships after college would be easier?
As I’ve mentioned before, as I graduated college I was at the moment in a relationship. So for me I was good on the dating and relationship front. I had before my relationship thought about what the dating life would be after college, I think we all do in some sort of way. Even afterwards I gave it more thought and for me the conclusion was it was only up from here. I’d meet women with college degrees, goal-oriented, branching out into their careers, levelheaded, intellectual, good conversation, getting themselves together, and things of the sort. I was completely wrong, so once things started not to materialize it was like oh what’s going on.
Am I the one bugging, but it’s not absurd for me or any other college grad to think the same. In speaking to my friend, she felt the same way. You get these notions because over the time spent in college, you’ve matured, grown, and expanded your horizons. You are now and even seen as an intellectual, open-minded and expecting the same from those around you. Because those are now the circumstances of your life, these are now the circles you include yourself in. So it does become disappointing when even in those circles and based on those circumstances you still face the difficulties that you do. Especially when the reasons that things don’t work out, are the most absurd.
Someone made a statement to me that your maturity level being different at 25 and 40, from when you were 15. To many extents they are correct, but when it comes to love and relationships it’s not so accurate. Someone could have all other areas covered as far as maturity; job/career, goals school and still be unevolved in terms of successful relationships. It’s a no fault, no blame area too; you can’t necessarily blame them for not being mature enough to be involved in a successful relationship neither. It’s one of those things that just MAY happen over time with no guarantee, when or if.
Stay tune there’s more to analyst coming in other parts.